You know what girls are great? Girls with boyfriends. What's so great about it? Here are some answers:
- The thrill of the hunt
- The constant element of combat
- The tactics and the strategy
- Just stop and think a moment about the funny scenarios, and random adventures that will take place. I mean it actually makes dating fun. It adds that extra element.
A small example is when I was in a similar situation, I had picked up the girl at her place and her boyfriend was in the window with a camera. I mean how great is that?
So are you tired of lame dates? Just date a girl with a boyfriend. |
Wedge72696: Come do drugs with me
SmarterChild: No thanks.
Wedge72696: are you my freind?
SmarterChild: Sure.
Wedge72696: Then do drugs.
SmarterChild: No thanks.
(5 minutes later)
Wedge72696: I love it.
SmarterChild: What do you love, exactly?
Wedge72696: Cocaine
SmarterChild: Nah, I don't partake.
btw, check this out: Narcotics Awareness 2006 - Drug Rehab -Drug Counselors - Drug Tests - Information - Launch 07/15 (sponsorship) |
A good flick will always have one of these traits. If one of these traits is present, it's bound to be a winner.
- Dry humor
- Bill Murray
- Cigar smoking and whisky drinking
- Something that harkens
- Majestic feats of engineering
- Artificially sounding "whacks," "whooshes," "clangs," and "swishes"
- The echoing "whack" and the slow motion that often accompany a final blow.
- Obvious looking wigs and fake beards.
- The words "The End". Better if they appear right after the final blow.
- Crackly, poppy, washboard style film
- An old fashioned traditional man stuck in modern times
- Clarion calls of trumpeters
- Mountain Men
- Old time boxers who could've been something
- Chauvinism
- Down on luck salesmen in a high tension office
- White fans
- Tournament and yet more tournament
- Clever use of wit
- Excessive use of fur
- Pattel and other highly comical deadbeats
- Female nudity
- Quotes like the following: "Hmpph...Hey you...I heard...your kung-fu...is pretty good."
Things to not look for, but look for at the same time. Like hating cigars and smoking them all the time.
- The rabid dog of Japanese cinema
- Arterial spray and other such depravity
I'm probably forgetting a bunch. Please feel free to add. |
Vernon was a company man
His hair trimmed short
and his sideburns shaved
He liked swiss and ham
He drank beer out of the can on Saturdays
He's a company man
Vernon was a company man
His hat glocked on his head like a bottlecap
His face read like a topographical map
He could chat like a bird when there was nothing to say
He's a company man
The undertaker dug him an early grave
He was a company man |
A band that uses the following instruments:
Whamola: The whamola is a unique bass instrument used in Funk-Jazz styles. It consists of a double-bass style neck, a pully and lever system, and one string, all mounted onto on a square metal tube on a stand. The whamola is played by hitting the string with a drum stick and either fretting the string with the other hand or using the lever and pully system to change the pitch.
Theramin: An instrument where you wave your hands in the air and it makes music. To control the theremin, the musician stands in front of the instrument and moves his or her hands in the proximity of two metal antennas, the distance from the antennas determining frequency (pitch) and amplitude (volume). Small and rapid movements of the hands can create a tremolo or vibrato effect. Typically the right hand controls the pitch and the left hand is used for the volume
Zydeco Necktie: Yes, a tie that you play. Percussive in nature.
Shofar Rams Horn Trumpet: It's a trumpet made out of a real rams horn. It is supposedly extremely loud too. It was traditionally used in certain religious festivals.
Stump Fiddle: This is an old-time rhythm instrument made of a stick and bottle caps. I first saw a stump fiddle when I was playing for some old folks in Burnsville, NC in 1976. It was used in both the black and white communities in that area. I have since learned there are variations of this simple instrument throughout the world.
Wind Harp: You don't even do anything. The wind blows through it and it filters the wind and makes music.
Listen to it using this link. http://www.oddmusic.com/clips/grandharp.mp3
Last but not least you need a guitar. Here's the obvious choice.
Cigar Box Guitar: Yes instead of a normal hollow section you use a cigar box. Here it with this link. http://www.oddmusic.com/clips/Love_in_Vain.mp3
What a band this would be. |
| » Area 4 |
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Why is typing up a journal entry or a story or a bit of prose or a paper no way near as satisfying as writing it with a pen and paper? It just feels a bit detached in comparison. Maybe this is because I like my writing to be natural and the things I generally like to write about are natural. Typing this up on a laptop at work feels so removed from my idea of writing and storytelling. Writing amidst white walls, lights, wires, and technology surely is unnatural for a writer. Give me a pen, a paper, and an unknown land anyday!
May. 2nd, 2006 @ 10:36 am
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| » Chewing Gum |
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Time. It's something that is continuous, yet we have no way to measure it continuously. We can only break it down to a single point. Therefore all measurements of time start from a single point. A point that we can calculate and work with. This is the building block for all measurements of time. From the basic measurement (I'll say that it's the second), we then base everything off of it, because it's the only thing we can perceive.
Ok. It takes 24 hours for the earth to rotate. That in essence is one day. It takes 360 days for the earth to orbit the sun. Is this calculation actually precise? Is the rotation of the Earth on its axis related in any way to the rotation around the sun? Without having done any real research on the topic, it seems as if they aren't actually related in any sort of precise mathematical fashion.
Therefore if I had a friend on Planet Voltron who needed to reheat some chicken for 60 seconds, there is no way it could translate over. 60 seconds is in fact 1/whatevereth of an Earth rotation, which means nothing outside of the paradigm for time calculations that we have constructed.
Einstein was on to something when he said that if someone in a plane is travelling very very fast, then they are essentially travelling in time. He said basically if you went ultra fast for 10 years, then 20 years could have passed by in Earth time. I believe there were experiments done where time went faster on a plane than on the ground. The plane had travelled ahead by a few minutes. So now, it's been shown that speed and traditional time are somehow related...Or more important perhaps, that our previous calculations of time are unprecise, simple, and old hat.
Therefore, is it possible that time can exist as a mathematical and measurable calculation? Does it actually exist or is the entire thing a fabrication? Is time relative? Or is it way over the head of our top minds of today?
May. 1st, 2006 @ 11:20 am
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| » Toads Are All Up In My Sandals |
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Let me tell you, I have been on a creative roll of late. For the past couple days, I've been playing the bass to the point where my fingers hurt. I've become a factory of great bass lines. If I can keep this up, shit I'm going to have to assemble a band sooner rather than later.
Names of Basslines:
To The Graveyard (reggae-vibe)
Sleuth (reminded me of an old school private eye in Chicago)
BOUNCE In Your Step (funky, sunny day, hip hop style riff)
Jessies Diner (pop rock style, one of those addictive types)
Bad Ass (completely rocked the funk out and totally bad ass)
It's funny how I've taken up most of these. I'd be playing a song, and coming up with my own bass lines. I'll hit a couple notes, then fiddle a bit, then find something pretty strong, then try to lock in with the drums/timing. Then I'll try to spruce up the line a bit, and if it's good enough sometimes I just throw off the timing and I got a new bass line.
So overall, playing the bass has finally gotten to the point where it has become fulfilling, even if I'm just fulfilling my creative energy and it never amounts to anything. I've been having a blast doing it. Also, to be quite honest I'm only messing around with major scales. Then again 80% of popular music you hear is done with only major and minor scales.
I'm probably going to continue to come up with great riffs, then factor in some work in minor and see where I can go with that. Then start mixing. Come summer, I'll probably buy a couple different pedals for different sound.
He's heating up!
Apr. 6th, 2006 @ 10:22 am
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| » Calling You Out |
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I'm calling out all you fakes and phoneys. I can see right through all of you. Me and my crew can see right through your gimmicks and facades. I'm talking about those guys that sell out themselves for women. Selling out themselves for respect. As a matter of fact, when you go out, there are sell outs everywhere. People who compromise their own selves to fit in with a general scene or to convey a more accepted image. Why you wearing a pink shirt, that ain't you, oh but some girls like it? What's that girly shit bumping out of your ricer? Turn that shit off. Now there is nothing wrong with comprimising in a situation, but comprimising your soul in a situation is another thing entirely.
There are people I know that are fake too. What happens when you keep adjusting your self to match a trend, or to match yourself particularly to what a certain group of women want? Yeah, you lose yourself in the process. After you get that girl, there ain't no more you. You're personality, your soul, your knowledge
all show signs of a weak human being. One that has to conform to fit, can't carry himself into and out of
a situation. You can see their heart isn't in their actions. That ain't you. Walk with heart and mind. Evaluate the situation, then bring heart and mind into it. Don't evaluate the situation then figure out how
you can comprimise yourself to fit in.
What's with the need to fit a certain stereotype? Yeah I mean the individualistic people, that actually just fit into another cliched image. At a way to pigeonhole yourself and your possibilities, rook. See, when you give up on self that's when your lost, cause you're playing with your life, like it's a coin toss.
Step off. You're weak.
Apr. 3rd, 2006 @ 03:58 pm
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| » They Reminisce Over You |
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On a rare occasion your parents would drop you off in public and you could go off and have fun without them watching over you. As long as the area was safe and you were with friends that they trusted. This was one of those times. So you take the 5 bucks from your pocket that you got from doing yardwork for the neighbors. You open the doors.
Some hip hop is playing, sounds like that De La Soul song you heard on the radio, and people are skating around the rink. The wheels are gliding over the slick wooden floors, sounding like a small rumble. They are bouncing to the music and gliding around the rink in circles at the same time. There are a couple kids even younger than you skating with their moms, holding hands, falling occasionally. Most of the beginners are in the smaller kiddie rink. You recall the days when you wouldn't go anywhere besides the kiddie rink. How could they possibly go that fast in the big kids rink, you would often times wonder to yourself.
You go up to the snack counter to see 3 of your freinds, Dan, Chris and Michelle. Mostly they are talking about reecess and the fight the other day. You can't wait to show off some of your new roller skating moves, like the 360 and of course the touch the floor 360 spin. You all go up to the snack stand and grab root beer floats.
You and your crew make your way over to the couple arcade games and drop in a quarter to play Street Fighter 2. You play a couple rounds against the computer but then the big kids come over. They looked like they were in 7th grade. Big kids were always scarier, especially middle-schoolers. They are all laughing as you play and they throw in a quarter. You proceed to destroy them, and laugh about it. The upbeat tempo and bouncy sounds of the music in the background perfectly compliments your mood at this moment.
The three of you go up to the counter and give the man 3 bucks so you can rent the rollerskates. As you hit the rink, you start slowly and awkwardly. Then before you know it, your moving much faster than you could ever imagine, and it seems as if your not even on your own two feet. Ignoring moms safety talks you toss your arms up then bring them down and do something like the twist and face your two friends who also do it. You take a dump backwards, and everyone is laughing. No big deal, no fake laughs, you get back up and you are all gliding along passing each other, cutting in the line. There is no expectations behind it, no awaiting something, just loving the moment, loving the speed, the free feeling, the bouncy smooth music, the wheels, your friends, and the taste of root beer float still on your lips.
Reminisce....Ya feel me?
Mar. 29th, 2006 @ 03:20 pm
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| » Strap On Your Saddle |
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It's 6am. You are very tired. The snooze button is taunting you with it's luscious lips and sexy thighs. But, oh no, do not touch it! Maybe you should concentrate on the fact that your head is pulsating, maybe you're saying that was one glass of wine too much last night? The alarm clock does not care about you or your well being. It continues to define all things suck with it's one note circus of noise. You feel a yearn from your pelvic region and you just have to take a leak. Well, it looks like your stuck now, you have to wake up. Wipe the dreamies out of your eyes, and turn that alarm clock off.
Now, proceed to walk around disheveled in a partially conscious state. Become delighted as the neccesary things to do for the day start dictating your every action of the morning. Then you hear a car horn honking outside. You look out the window, the streets are dark and wet from last nights downpour. It's chilly and breezy. Below your apartment window people are adjusting their coats to better prepare themselves for the cold. You see it's your friends car and you are getting ready for the ride to work. Feeling terrible, you throw on some clothes which were lying on your desk chair, give your hair a quick comb so it's not sticking up in 10 directions.
Your head is pulsating, your bladder is screaming because you forgot to go to the bathroom, you know you had one too many merlot's, and you have the reassuring feeling that you probably forgot something you needed for the day. Your friend turns towards you and gives you just the news you've been wanting to hear.
"You don't look ready! Strap on your saddle and sack up! In 15 minutes we're going to be running that 20 kilometer marathon we signed up for!"
Seriously, how do these people do it?
OH GOD! Your shirt says "Robokin", not "Robocop". Silly me.
Mar. 16th, 2006 @ 01:59 pm
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| » Shigeru Miyamato: A Great Man With A Pure Spirit |
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Shigeru Miyamoto is truly a gem in today's world. Believe me, this man is an absolute genius and wonderfully creative. He is also a genuine person, and a pure spirit. Despite being a mega celebrity in the gaming industry, he lives a truly humble lifestyle. The reason why I am going to talk about him in my livejournal is (besides the fact that he is a personal hero of mine) because he reminds me a lot of myself. Especially as a child, and even in a lot of aspects today. This entry doesn't focus on the business aspect, and more looks into the persona of Miyamoto-san. So, please read and enjoy the excerpts I have taken into the wonderful person that is Shigeru Miyamoto.
It's evidence that gaming still occupies a cultural ghetto that Shigeru Miyamoto isn't a household name. Owain Bennalack reports in his final People Profile of the week. Within videogame-literate circles, of course, the 53-year old creator of Mario transcends categorisation. Miyamoto is known for quality, rock solid gameplay, and enduring characters like Mario and Link - yet just as much for invention and risk-taking.
While an interview with Miyamoto can be somewhat underwhelming, like all the 20th Century's most famous artists he's accrued a stock of famous quotes. "Video games are bad for you? That's what they said about rock and roll," is atypically tart. Rather, it's a glimpse into his vision of gaming and the inspiration behind it (he famously grew up exploring secret caves near his childhood Kyoto home) that best sums up Miyamoto's philosophy.
"What if everything you see is more than what you see - the person next to you is a warrior and the space that appears empty is a secret door to another world? What if something appears that shouldn't? You either dismiss it, or you accept that there is much more to the world than you think. Perhaps it really is a doorway, and if you choose to go inside, you'll find many unexpected things."
Shigeru Miyamoto was born on November 16th, 1952, in the small town of Sonebe on the countryside outside of Kyoto, Japan. The young Miyamoto grew up among grassy hillsides, sodden rice fields, small canyons, and a river full of fish. After school, when not reading books, drawing, or painting, he would often join other children from the neighborhood to play baseball and other games, and in the evenings arrange heroic dance dramas and puppet shows.
One of Miyamoto's most exciting memories was when he discovered a cave in the surrounding landscape where he lived as a child. While playing on the hillsides, young Miyamoto stumbled upon an opening of a cave. Not until he had returned several times did he build up enough courage to enter it. Equipped with only a homemade lantern, he climbed through. Miyamoto still remembers the exhilaration he felt as he discovered a small hole leading to yet another cave.
As the Miyamoto family had no car and no television, Shigeru was overjoyed when they got to travel to Kyoto by train every few months to explore the city, shop, and watch movies. Some of his favorites were the Disney classics, such as Peter Pan and Snow White. Eventually, the family moved to Kyoto, where Miyamoto met new friends with whom he formed a secret club in the family's attic where secret codes were traded.
Miyamoto wanted to be an artist when he grew up, be it a performer, a puppeteer, or a painter. When he was not studying, he used to draw nature scenes and make plastic models and wooden contraptions. He was also very fond of cartoons and organized a cartoon club at school that had yearly exhibitions. Miyamoto would soon get to play many video games and loved them. Through video games, the nature of cartoons which Miyamoto cherished came to life.
Kanazawa College of ArtWhen he was eighteen years old, Miyamoto entered Kanazawa Munici College of Industrial Arts and Crafts. He would only attend class about half the time and instead spent his time drawing comics, listening to music, and playing in a band, it took him five years to graduate. He learned to play the guitar and performed at coffeehouses and parties together with a banjo player he met in Kyoto.
After graduating in 1977, Miyamoto asked his father to contact an old friend to find out if he could work for his toy company called Nintendo. The old friend was Hiroshi Yamauchi who ran Nintendo even back then, and although his company didn't need any painters, he agreed to meet up with young Miyamoto as a favor to his friend. Yamauchi met Shigeru Miyamoto and he liked him enough to ask him to return for another meeting.
This time, Miyamoto returned bearing a portfolio with some ideas for toys. Among those were a clothes hanger designed for children, a whimsical clock for an amusement park, and a swing within a seesaw enabling three children to play at once. Yamauchi was impressed by Miyamoto's ingenuity and hired him to be Nintendo's first staff artist. Miyamoto was assigned to be an apprentice in the planning department where he had to evaluate new ideas that would go into production. Although he didn't work with video games initially, he worked with everything from toys to motors.
Miyamoto had some interesting ideas about the way video games should be designed. He thought the shooters and tennis-like games he had played in the arcades were uninteresting and wondered why the games couldn't have great stories like King Kong and Jason and the Argonauts. As Miyamoto saw Radarscope, he found it simplistic and unimaginative. He decided to throw it away completely and start on a new game.
After consulting with the technicians about the limitations of the arcade machine, Miyamoto returned to his desk and started brainstorming. He decided for a story similar to Beauty and the Beast but simplified it. He came up with his own beast, a giant gorilla which was the pet of a mean, little man. Donkey Kong The man, who was a carpenter, wasn't especially nice to the ape, and at his first opportunity, the ape escaped and kidnapped the man's beautiful girlfriend.
The carpenter's mission was to climb up an unfinished foundation of a building in order to reach the gorilla, who was at the top with his girlfriend. The ape would make the main character's way up hard by throwing down barrels and cement tubs. The chubby man would need to climb ladders and ride conveyor belts and elevators to reach the top. When he finally reached the top of the building, the gorilla would escape and the man had to follow him to the next level. The player had to beat four levels in order to finally rescue the girl.
Miyamoto has said that he likes to wander around the streets of a new city without a map, because something unexpected would always happen; it makes him feel like he is on an adventure. He would pass through a tunnel and the scene would be totally different on the other side. As a child, he once discovered a lake while hiking, which was a pleasant surprise for him. Another childhood memory for Miyamoto was a maze of sliding doors in his family home back in Sonebe. The curious youngster would often find himself lost in the doorways.
Princess ZeldaAll those memories and experiences are recreated in Miyamoto's games. He wants the players to feel like they are in the game, feeling the cold air around them and the exhilaration of finding something new and unexpected. One such game was The Legend of Zelda, in which Link, a brave adventurer, would explore vast areas, dark caves, and strange cities in his quest to save his country Hyrule and rescue the lovely princess, Zelda, from the king of thieves, Ganon. The Legend of Zelda was released in mid-1987 for Nintendo's 8-bit wonder machine and was the first stand-alone game to sell one million units (it would end up selling more than 6.5 million copies worldwide).
During Miyamoto's early years at Nintendo, he met a woman named Yasuko, who worked in the general administration department. The two would fall in love and wed. As they married, the Miyamotos moved into a small house near the NCL headquarters. To this day, Miyamoto walks or rides a bike to work everyday. When the couple's first baby was born, Yasuko stopped working. Miyamoto often plays games like Mario Kart 64 with his two children, and although they've asked more than once for a PlayStation, he doesn't think they need one.
By looking at him, Shigeru Miyamoto seems quite ordinary. Standing a mere 5'5" in height and in his late forties, his trademark dark Beatles-styled hair-do and regular clothing aren't what one would expect from a man often called a genius. Even Miyamoto's watch isn't the standard Rolex one would expect from a man with a generous salary, but a playful plastic yellow watch sold in toy stores. Still, his appearances are deceptive, as Miyamoto is no ordinary man. According to Yamauchi, "an ordinary man cannot develop good games no matter how hard he tries. A handful of people in this world can develop games that everybody wants. Those are the people we want at Nintendo."
Yamauchi wanted that one genius that would drive Nintendo to success, and that man would turn out to be Miyamoto. While Miyamoto humbly says he thinks it was nothing more than destiny that made him successful, most people agree that it was because of Miyamoto's talents and devotion to games. He has said that he loves making games so much, he would do it for free, and while it's meant to be a joke, there is probably some truth in those words, as he really seems to find pleasure in his work.
Ever since he was a little kid, Miyamoto has always had an ambition to make something that would astonish the world. He has the desire to do something others haven't, and it appears Yamauchi has the same philosophy. Whenever Miyamoto proposes a new kind of game idea the NCL president has never heard of, Yamauchi gives his top designer the green light. Miyamoto wants his games to entertain the players in a fresh and surprising way. He wants the games to encourage them to think of alternatives that lead to different results, rather than rewarding them for a single answer. Consequently, the players will become more creative and actively involved.
Miyamoto in the seventh heavenWhen asked what game character would represent him best, Miyamoto responded: "Lakitu in the Super Mario series. He seems to be very free, floating in the air, going anywhere. And that's me, that is." That certainly is a good description of the mastermind that made Nintendo into what it is today. Miyamoto has gone from goofy gorillas, chubby plumbers, and green elves to long-tongued dinosaurs and flying foxes. Although no one knows where he will go next, one thing is certain: whatever Miyamoto comes up with in the future, it will take the world by surprise.
It seems to me that gaming really needs more people like Miyamoto. Of course, there can only be one Miyamoto as there is only one Walt Disney or one George Lucas. But, he has a purity of spirit, a certain genuine love for his games, a certain quality, and endearing outside the box fun that a lot of games seem to be lacking these days. Miyamoto's childhood experiences, his voice can often be very similar to my own, his ideas and concepts are similar to mine. I mean about 3-4 posts ago I talked of the kind of adventure that Miyamoto loves. All in all, Miyamoto had a large hand in the development of the new Nintendo Revolution and I have never been more excited for a game system in my life.
Feb. 20th, 2006 @ 02:05 pm
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| » Curtis Hughes Is PISSED |
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Curtis Hughes is PISSED. He is not impressed or amused.
Feb. 2nd, 2006 @ 01:57 pm
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| » Virgins. |
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Virgins are great. Unreasonable Men LOVE to defy virgins. They lend
comedy to any situation.
-God's only accept virgins.
-Virgins used to be traded on the stock market.
-Evil emperors love virgins.
-As soon as you conquer turf, you should demand virgins. Hell, I would.
-Nothing says congratulations on victory to a Great General like a
handful of virgins.
-Satyrs only exist because of virgins.
-Only virgins are allowed to be sacrificed.
Jan. 31st, 2006 @ 09:57 am
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| » Adventure |
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This entry starts with a small excerpt from a short story. Then comes my own words.
This excerpt is taken from The Green Door by O'Henry
Pure adventure. Would you accept it? Not you. You would flush with embarrassment; you would sheepishly drop the roll and continue down Broadway, fumbling feebly for the missing button. This you would do unless you are one of the blessed few in whom the pure spirit of adventure is not dead.
True adventurers have never been plentiful. They who are set down in print as such have been mostly business men with newly invented methods. They have been out after the things they wanted--golden fleeces, holy grails, lady loves, treasure, crowns and fame. The true adventurer goes forth aimless and uncalculating to meet and greet unknown fate. A fine example was the Prodigal Son--when he started back home.
Half-adventurers--brave and splendid figures--have been numerous. From the Crusades to the Palisades they have enriched the arts of history and fiction and the trade of historical fiction. But each of them had a prize to win, a goal to kick, an axe to grind, a race to run, a new thrust in tierce to deliver, a name to carve, a crow to pick--so they were not followers of true adventure.
In the big city the twin spirits Romance and Adventure are always abroad seeking worthy wooers. As we roam the streets they slyly peep at us and challenge us in twenty different guises.
I long for someone else with a sense of adventure. I still have the spirit in me, but convention and routine are slowly starting to strangle me in their constrictor like grip. The lifestyle that comes with a career, the lifestyle that comes with a built in routine tends to favor and support conveinence. Many schools of thought and success are built around the end goals of security and convenience.
Yet, I still get in my car each and every lunch break and look for something new. My search is always limited because I can't take too long on my break. Even if I just have a bag lunch, I go on a drive to find an isolated spot where I can eat and allow my oh so precious imagination to take flight. My car is like my steed, it accompanies me everywhere, it is my vehicle for all sorts of adventure. But, I have places I need to be, things that have to be done. I long for the adventure of boyhood. When I drive with no goal in mind, I seek those same feelings that I used to have when I walked into the woods, into the unknown. I remember the fun I used to have with just me and my imagination. There was a purity to adventure then, a sense of adventure for adventures sake. Now, we need "something to do". Bowling, movies, bar, restaurant. There always has to be a destination, because it is convenient and we know the relative feelings and emotions we will get out of such establishments.
Hopipola
Jan. 24th, 2006 @ 01:28 pm
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| » Nothing Says Pompous Arrogant Asshole Like A Big Fat Cigar |
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I was never the biggest cigar fan. Then a group of friends and myself were invited to a cocktail party thrown by a few of my freinds (girls). So I decided to run with it and wear my FIVE HUNDRED DOLLAR SUIT to the occasion. It wasn't complete. I wasn't satirically mocking upper class society enough. Then it dawned on me. We all got cigars!
I walked in the house smoking it, was told to put it out, so I did. Several girls complained. A couple hours later I relit, then a freind relit, then I relit again! As it was lit this girl was talking about how obnoxious cigars are and how they make her sick. I said "Oh really?" She left. I laughed hard and took a hearty puff. Wine and cigars are a great combo.
Anyway, I love to bust up my mom, and pull cheesy little pranks every now and then. This time I bought a cigar and smoked it in my house! I sat there puffing looking to fill the room with the awful stench of a ninety nine cent cigar. Then, I hear my brothers choking in the room next to mine. I was OHOHOHOHO'ing hard, tossing beard, and puffing cigar. My brothers ran downstairs asking my mom if her chain smoking friend came over because it reaks. My mom came up and starting choking. I was laughing so hard. She then proceeded to wash up. The stench was dence.
Last night, a family friend came over and was talking about how she went to a polo match. How it was nice and relaxing, and people brought basket lunches and had some wine. Several people smoked cigars. It was a very yuppie affair. So can you see what I'm suggesting? Yes. A box of wine. Several cigars. Then we just drink, yell, smoke cigars, and be obnoxious. We will be the loudest people in polo history. We will find a team to root for, and scorn the other team. Lots of name calling, chants, and yelling. OHOHOHOHOHO. I hate yuppies.
Jan. 13th, 2006 @ 12:22 pm
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| » 2005: A Rise To Greatness (Fixed) |
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So, being a New Year and all, I decided this would be high time to talk about how much ass I kicked in 2005. 2005 was truly the greatest year of my life. Since the title of this journal is -Grandmasters Unite!- I also encourage other grandmasters to share how much ass they kicked in 2005 as well. 2005 was officially the year were I bursted out of my cu koon. It was one I was shaping for years. I graduated from college with my Bachelors in Management Information Systems from WPI. I also graduated with distinction. Kick ass. I also wrote one of the most heady and brilliant sufficiencies to come out of the Philosophy department, and had a blast on my MQP.
I also had the greatest vacation of my life, Spring Break, which was amazing. I created great freindships with my college peers, ones that go way beyond generic college freindships. I had several trips to Maine, several great parties and end of the year and graduation bashes. There was a lot of celebration in 2005, and it all ruled. We always stepped things up and upped the ante each time we got together. We finally made the intramural playoffs and I had a solid basketball season especially in the first half of the season where I was a top 3 scorer every night. We also made it to the volleyball championship game in our volleyball debut. A good run there as well.
I furthered a sense of creativity, I searched within me, HARD, and discovered many new amazing things. I found a desire, a penchant for needing to constantly create, a loathing of complacency, a loathing of standard and generic. Once I graduated I picked up a bass guitar and started bringing out my inner funk whilst bringing out the creative side of me. I have several ideas for stuff I want to write and music I want to make. I've made good progress on the bass, and ok progress on writing (this livejournal is a start). I planted seeds of creativity that I will continue to grow and continue to bloom in this next year. I am once again creating my surroundings.
I also delved into chess once again. I love it. I went from beginner ranks and have improved with each and every game I played. I always focused on improving. After reading The Art of War by Sun Tzu I really dived back into chess. It's great. It's the pieces, the war, the strategy, the opponent, the countering, the defense, the attack, the risks. It's a lot like a swordfight or a duel of great minds. Clearly, something of the masters.
I studied the wisdom of many of history's greatest thinkers. I studied wisdom, I seeked the wise and the experienced and have taken their advice to heart and to mind. Starting with the utterly insane/deep thinking/reading I did whilst writing my large philosophy paper I seeked more and more knowledge. More and more wisdom. I coupled that with my experiences, my environment, my surroundings, and I started to truly bring out myself. I am many, many years wise beyond my age. I will continue this path, throughout this year as well.
As a part of this I developed a means with which I can get my body and mind to become one, because as of now, my mind is waaaaaay beyond my body. This year starts bodily training, and spiritual training. I am taking Kung Fu in May. I am training my body for it starting now and into May. I have already planted those seeds with a gym membership, a study, and a profound interest in the Martial Arts.
I've also managed to get a good job as well. For those of you that don't know, I am a QA Engineer at APC (American Power Conversions). Basically, I write test plans, and create tests and testing infrastructure for the software that manages the data centers of various corporations including possibly the corporation you're in! I've been on the fence about the job for a little while, and overall I really do like it, I get to talk to my freinds, do some work which can be a mini puzzle and the such and I get to see the fruits of my work as well. It's also a very technical job, and the amount I've learned about device communication, networking, testing, network hardware, project management, software development, and with working in an Extreme Programming environment I've learned how to be productive against tight schedules. It's amazing how much more effective Extreme Programming is versus something like Fidelity which spends infinite time processing and diagramming. I sort of keep that in check. So, it's a good job that I enjoy, and I will continue to accrue funds so I can pay off my loans at a high rate. I want my loans basically gone in 2 years.
I've always loved concerts and of course the funk peaked early in the year. I discovered some great new music throughout the year, and always continue to explore more and more music. I'm never content with what I have, and I'm always thristing for new music, new sound, and creative ventures. As the year rolled on my tastes became more and more eclectic and diverse. There haven't been many new concerts and the beginning of this year looks slow, but hopefully it will build up.
I've developed a taste for Kung Fu flicks and other movies that kick ass. Basically, no chaff, all winnow. Nothing that was released this year really knocked my socks off. I did enjoy several movies though.
I still continued to play videogames, and beat several. With my graduation money I bought a Gamecube and built my Gamecube library up. That was something I wanted to do for a while.
As my personality becomes stronger and stronger, as I become wiser, as I become more creative, as I become more succesful, as I become more eclectic I clearly needed a change in style as well. After all an appropriate style is a difficult art of balancing all the nuances of one's character and creating an outfit to match. I obviously need several outfits to match ALL THAT. I have superflous clothing, sophisticated stuff, casual stuff and that will all continue to build up throughout the year. I am also growing out my hair into a puffy mini fro of glory. It already looks great, and this is merely the very beginning stages. I needed to distinguish myself from the masses on the outside, and that has begun.
So, the seeds are planted for this year to continue to kick ass and to continue to build up myself. I think I will smoke a cigar and chat with another man on the porch and laugh easily in the freezing cold with no shoes on. Wait. Did that.
Lists
Top Concert: Parliament Funkadelic @ Lupos in Providence in January
Top Concert Discovery: Karl Densons Tiny Universe at Websters Underground Theater in Hartford
Top Concert Spent In Disbelief: Bernie Worrell and the Woo Warriors at some bar/restaurant in CT
Top 5 Movies I Saw This Year: Rambo II, 5 Deadly Venoms, 7 Grandmasters, Drunken Master, Master of the Flying Guillotine
Top 5 Music Discoveries: Frank Zappa, Praxis, Karl Densons Tiny Universe, Soulive, Wu Tang Solo Albums
Top 5 Videogames of This Year: God of War (PS2), Resident Evil 4 (GCN), Shadow of the Colossus (PS2), Devil May Cry 3 (PS2), Killer 7 (GCN)
Best Trip/Vacation: Spring Break: Gulf Side
Best Book: Thus Spoke Zarathustra by Nietzsche
I apologize for the long entry. This will probably the longest entry and probably the most personal.
So everyone else share their thoughts, feelings about their year. Or if you want about my year from your perspective, or whatever. Grandmasters Unite!
Jan. 3rd, 2006 @ 11:27 am
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| » A Tale of Musk |
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So, it's a couple of days before Christmas and instead of smelling like wreaths, eggnog, fireplace and mistletoe, I decided this year's Christmas should wreak of musk. Especially with Bone coming down later
that day.
So, being in Cranston and all, I went to the sketchy cologne/perfume wholesale discount place. Nonetheless, when I walked in I was drowning in the guidos. The perfume and cologne was enough to
make Salvatore DeLeone choke. The place was packed and I could barely move. So, I stood in front of the counter for 10 minutes, and I wasn't too hard to notice being notiecably taller than everyone else, and
looking as if I needed help. No help came, so I decided not to help "Joe's Wholesale" by giving them my business.
Alas, Bone arrives and my car smells dissapointingly normal. It doesn't wreak of the suffocating stench of the funkiest dog around, the hot weiner, and it doesn't smell of the most dense musk anyone could
bottle. So, after some talk, Bone and I decided to do something about this. We ventured to Filenes in the mall, seeking the muskiest aroma they carry.
Finally, we walk into Filenes and tell the lady we want the muskiest fragrance she has. "It has to wreak of musk, it would be great if the bottle just said "musk" on it. I would like it to be incredibly
pungent." The customers behind us said "That's quite the description whilst laughing." The employee was confused and let us sample several decidedly unmusky colognes. We then had to give her a more vivid
description. "We don't want this to smell even remotely good. It has to be terrible and over the top." I then pitched in with "It needs to smell like we just shot a bear." We could barely contain our laughter
and after she let us sample some more unmusky cologne we were just laughing hard in her face. She was getting flustered on the job by these jovial men. At this point we were OHOHOHOing. We then told her it
was a gift for my father, and explained to her that he HATES new scents, and prefers his cologne to smell like cedar, pine and ash. "He likes it to smell like the woods of Maine." She was fumbling through
more Polo's and the like until she pulled out this stuff called Aramis. It was TERRIBLE. It was probably the worst cologne I have ever smelt. Like all bad musks the color of it was a piss yellow. The lady said she hated it and it was revolting. People around us were choking, we were OHOHOHO'ing as we sprayed clouds of Aramis musk everywhere. There has never been a more awful scent. This was the one we had to buy. So, she
had enough of our shit and left for a while. When we got her attention again we bought some Aramis. It rang up at $40! $40! For the worst smelling cologne imageinable? That's a pretty expensive joke. But, it
had to be done. So, I purchased it. 2 minutes later I was regretting my decision, but we decided we would spray it all over the car and then return it after Christmas, in hopes that the scent would stick in the
seats so that when Nose came down, it would still wreak of musk.
We sprayed it in the seats, in the fabric, in the cushions and even in the vents of my car. The smell was rank, offensive, and vulgar. We smelled TERRIBLE.
Now, fast forward to the day after Christmas. Bone and I reunite and decide it's high time to return the musk. After all, it's $40. We walk up to register hoping it was the same lady. We had our plan: We were
going to tell her my father opened it and said it wasn't rank enough. As we OHOHOHO'd through the aisles of Filenes with a bag of musk, alas it wasn't the same lady. Nevertheless, I wanted my cash back. So I
claimed someone bought this for me as a gift and I hated it. It was a bad smelling cologne that I would never wear. She said, well, "This must have been bought in a different store, there is no way any of the
employees that work here would have reccomended this cologne for a young man." "This cologne is not fit for a young man such as yourself. It's more for an old man." Bone then chimes in by saying "It was probably meant for a sea faring captain. This does not smell good, not even for an old man." The lady at the register laughed and asked if I wanted anything else. "Oh, he's all set. He has quite a collection of
many fine scents." Bone quipped in my behalf. She then looked closer at the receipt and saw that it was purchased at this store. She was noticeably shaken when she saw that. She then said some derogatory
statements about the employee that sold it to us saying "She doesn't really work here much, and doesn't really know what she's doing." I then added "Yeah I don't know why she would reccomend that." Bone had
to walk away before busting out laughing. She gave me my cash back and we raised our arms in victory.
In the aftermath of this musky fiasco, I'm sure the lady that handled our return will scold the lady who sold this musk to us. The lady who sold it to us is probably going to say "These men came in and they were
hooligans. They wanted the worst smelling cologne we had. They said it had to be pungent and terrible. They kept laughing, and dismissing all the colognes I reccomended to them by saying they were too sweet and
nice." The lady who handled our return probably will not believe her. I mean, who walks into a cologne section seeking the worst cologne possible and then pays $40 bucks for it on top of that?
OHOHOHOHOHOHOHO
Dec. 27th, 2005 @ 10:21 am
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| » The Elder Gods |
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The Elder God's put me on. They have chosen me. I have come to lead.
(real update coming soon)
Dec. 23rd, 2005 @ 12:51 pm
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| » I Now Own One of the Most Horribly Offensive Shirts Possible |
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I joined a gym yesterday with my buddy Mike to begin some bodily training throughout the winter. However, upon signing up they give you a free t-shirt. Cool, I thought to myself, nothing wrong with a free shirt. However, the t-shirt is one of the most horribly offensive shirts possible. It's so offensive that I will not even wear it. It has a huge thumb up on it. As a matter of fact it's so huge that I can just hear the sarcasm coming off the tip of the thumb. The thumb up is clearly mocking the person wearing this shirt. Then once you get over the large thumb up, you will then read the text. The text reads as follows: Judgement Free Zone. So the shirt, is a giant, sarcastic thumb up and it says Judgement Free Zone. I mean can you imagine a fat person wearing this shirt, or a disfigured person? Just wearing this shirt is like wearing a sign that says "I am not an attractive person at all, as a matter of fact I am ugly in some fashion, but this giant, sarcastic thumb up means its ok." The thumb up might as well be a slap in the face or a middle finger pointing back at the person wearing the shirt. As of now, this shirt is sitting in the backseat of my car, waiting for its victim, waiting to see what fool would wear it, waiting to see who's day it could ruin. I then figured this would make an excellent gift, but I can't think of anyone who I could give the shirt to that wouldn't be terribly offended. Just wearing this shirt must kill your self esteem. So, I now own one of the most horribly offensive shirts possible, a relationship killer, and a lethal weapon all in one.
OHOHOHOHOHOHO
Dec. 8th, 2005 @ 10:58 am
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